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Dear
Friend,
Spring,
the harbinger of
new growth and fresh starts is upon us.
In that spirit, I am assessing what needs to grow and change in my
life,
so I can plant seeds now for blossoms to appear in the coming
months. Gardening analogies seem apt to the process
of human development.
Growth
happens in
stages, over time. The intention, or
seed of an idea, is essential to future growth, but not
sufficient. The environmental factors, sun, water, and
the right soil are all needed for the seed to take root and grow to its
full
potential.
Recently
I
read a critical
thinking challenge by Steve Siebold:
“Are my habits,
actions and
behaviors congruent with the vision I have
for my life?”
Considering this
challenge has been rich territory for me to explore whether I am
spending my
time, working and thinking in ways that truly support my future.
I
find it
important to
celebrate the small triumphs of where I have achieved a level of
congruency, as
well as noticing areas that are out of alignment.
When I encounter those
areas, I narrow the
scope to one or two items, and commit to creating the necessary
adjustments. These
adjustments are
developmental -- growth comes over weeks and months after the seed has
been
planted.
If
one of
your areas to
“start fresh” this spring involves restoring a
relationship tarnished by
miscommunication, I believe you will find some helpful tips in this
month’s
feature article.
Happy
Spring!
"To be curious about
how someone else interprets
things, we have to be willing to admit that we’re not capable
of figuring
things out alone…."
"Change
always starts with confusion; cherished
interpretations must dissolve to make way for the new. Great
ideas and inventions miraculously
appear in the space of not knowing."
These
quotes are from Turning
To One
Another by Margaret Wheatley. To purchase this book
or for more book recommendations please visit the Fulfilling
Work
website.
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In
this issue:
- Feature Resource: High Performance
Collaboration
- Feature Article: Resolving
Miscommunication
- Call to Action
High
Performance Collaboration 
This
CD program provides usable information about improving the
effectiveness of communication and collaboration in any situation where
people need to work together.
It is usually one of the first
resources I suggest to my coaching
clients because it contains some very fundamental principles about the
power we have as individuals to influence the dynamics of the
situations around us by making some subtle, but significant shifts in
our behavior. The program was created by some
leading thinkers here in Boulder, Colorado based
on their work with 200,000
people in 400 organizations in 30 countries.
For more information click
here.
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Resolving Miscommunication
Communicating
with other people productively is one of the most engaging and
enriching
experiences in my life. However, the majority of
situations people discuss with me in coaching sessions are about
communication
gone awry—either they don’t understand what others
are trying to convey, or
they are not able to communicate in a way that is understood by others.
Certainly, this is a common organizational concern as any two humans
are bound
to perceive the world differently. Those
differences are both the seeds of conflict and the source of new ideas
and
solutions.
Communication
mishaps can cause incredible pain, as I know from personal experience.
Miscommunications have caused me sleepless nights, anxiety, and a great
deal of
stress. To help you avoid a similar fate, here are the methods I have
been
using to resolve miscommunications.
One
of the first steps to help work through a
miscommunication is to think about the main purpose of your interaction
with
the other person or group. This
understanding
is needed to help guide your
decisions about resolving the issue and to provide an important quality
check:
“Have I preserved or enhanced the primary focus of this
relationship through
resolving a miscommunication?” If you can answer that
question positively, you
know you’re on the right track.
Do
not try to evaluate your success based on whether the person now
understands
“how right you are.” This strategy inevitably leads
to further communication
mishaps.
I
have found that clarity on three levels is required to resolve a
misunderstanding:
- The
first level is obtaining a common understanding of the concrete facts
of a
situation,
- The
second level is discussing the various interpretations that resulted
from those
facts,
- The
third level is gaining agreement about what to do next.
Too
often, only one or two of the levels are addressed, which leads to
further
communication problems.
Read
the rest of the article | Print
the rest of the article
Call
to Action
As the seasons change,
so can we. Take time to notice aspects of your work that
could use refreshing.
- Are
there unresolved communication issues?
- Ways
in which you could better plan your time?
- Ways
in which you need to take better care of yourself?
Commit
to addressing these issues by setting time on your calendar,
making the phone call or whatever else you need to do. Then
enjoy the feeling of a fresh start this season! |
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